Where are the Men (and Women)?!

Once again a continuation of a previous post, or at least an extension of a thought. A good percentage of the people I work with are chronological adults but emotional children. And sadly the more I look around the more I see this in the greater community, even our nation. People are devolving into emotional adolescence. The immediacy of the news cycle – whatever that is nowadays – leads to both intellectual and emotional confusion, and without an ingrained moral compass we lose our way. Social media, while being a boon for those isolated and alone, has evolved (devolved?) into a false reality and thus our pattern of interpreting and giving meaning to information grows distorted and the echo chamber of our mind resonates with this distortion.

One of my favorite websites is The Art of Manliness. It was started as a blog on manly virtues and skills but evolved (correct word!) into a treasure trove of skills and philosophical dissertations on virtues and ideas. It is very well written. So rather than paraphrase and even steal without proper attribution I present instead the actual article. Why gild the lily?

What our nations and communities need now more than ever are men and women with “chests.” And it is up to us, this current generation, to learn and pass this on. You can’t teach what you don’t know, so please take the time to read the article, consider your own pattern, and act accordingly.


No one teaches this anymore. Why? Because they weren’t taught. And some things can’t be taught, they must be experienced. The “Greatest Generation” failed to teach their children the most important lesson of all, that of delayed gratification. They did great things, built greatness, but they were able to because they knew lack, they experienced deprivation and it made them strong. Tough. That toughness can’t be taught. It is gained through trial, and they wanted us to not know those trials and thus deprived their children of the lessons. Now, when the going gets tough there are few tough to get going. We are a society of whiners, of weaklings, of Wainrights. The cultural Childish Emotional Mind is ascendant and those few who are tough, who are actually adults are now vilified and labeled as “bad.” Terrorist or Freedom Fighter? Depends on your perspective. And the cultural narrative is turning towards the former, not knowing even what freedom is.

We have perpetuated and deepened the culture of Wainright by not allowing for failure, for inadequacy. We hand out participation trophies, and the competent, skilled and even brilliant do it themselves rather than teach and allow real learning through failure.

And once again, Brett McKay has posted more eloquently than I:


One thought on “Where are the Men (and Women)?!

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  1. I absolutely agree with this. It seems like, unfortunately for our evolution to continue in a positive direction that we are going to have to live until we’re 200 just to mature enough to deal with living. People in general seem to either be overly sensitive and emotional towards relatively general information or completely desensitized. Neither set realizing that they are in need of genuine guidance ergo they would not seek to inquire information through any sort of self-help literature. That is its own sadness because we should always be growing mentally. It seems that we are finally living up to the true definition of retardation, as in there being a severe lack of growth. It is extremely unfortunate for these particular individuals that a traumatic life altering experience must occur for them to acknowledge some absence of depth within.


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